Friday, September 14, 2012

1.7 - Parrott Problems

Despite Simon's obvious disdain for them, Emma cannot seem to keep away from the unfolding drama that is the Parrotts. She also feels quite sorry for poor Jazlyn, and when she gets a call from her saying that she's had the baby, Emma jumps at the chance for a visit.

Emma's wondering if Simon will notice a credit card bill for some newly ordered maternity clothes...

Arriving at the Parrott's house, Jazlyn comes downstairs carrying her brand new little daughter, who she has named Malina. 

"Hi Emma, I'm so glad you could come over, I need someone to talk to, the baby's keeping me up all night!"

Now Emma doesn't know a whole lot about Motherhood (yet), but she can tell when a Sim is run down and completely exhausted (red plumbob!).

It doesn't look like Jazlyn's been getting any sleep, and she hasn't even changed out of her maternity clothes! Emma's also pretty sure Jazlyn's depressed, as she doesn't seem very excited about her brand new daughter!

Aww, poor Jazlyn, she never smiles! (I think she has postpartum depression)

After she gets the baby to sleep again, Jazlyn asks Emma to come into Kanoa's office. She then proceeds to show her a long sequence of chat conversations and emails, with some pretty graphic pictures, of the two women (TWO!) Kanoa's been having ongoing affairs with for the past months.

"Wow,  I'm speechless ... these photos are ... uh ... disgusting!"

Emma tells Jazlyn she should not have to put up with this horrible cheating anymore and is glad Jazlyn broke it off with that slimy Kanoa, but why is he still living in the house?

Jazlyn explains how she has always wanted a big family and it just makes her sick to her stomach to get divorced, with a brand new baby and her older son Ethan suffering a broken home.

"Jazlyn you know you have to be brave and do the right thing. You deserve happiness too ..."

Emma's not sure if her advice is right to give, but she encourages Jazlyn to kick Kanoa out. If he was having an affair with two other women, while still married to her AND she was pregnant, he clearly has no respect for women at all and he'll just do it again if she lets him stay.

"Grrrr... you're right Emma, he's just a dog and its time he hits the road!" (Be brave Jazlyn!)

Jazlyn decides she's going to cut it off and kick him out.

(If only Emma knew what Jazlyn really meant when she said 'cut it off' ... eek!)

After that, Emma suggests some ways for poor Jazlyn to relax and regain some self esteem. First up, a change of new clothing, then a trip out somewhere nice and perhaps a visit to the spa or salon was in order!

As it turns out, Jazlyn and Emma are about the same size, and Emma's got boxes full of designer clothes she can't wear now that she's wearing maternity (she hasn't told Jazlyn yet) - so she runs home to get some while Jazlyn takes a bubble bath to relax.

One of the Parrott's many Parrots (yes of course they have parrots!) is squawking its head off, so while she waits for Jazlyn, Emma feeds the poor thing, which promptly tries to attack her through the food opening.

"You ungrateful beast, maybe you should just starve to death!"

All that screeching has woken up the baby, so Emma gets her first chance to hold her while Jazlyn's in the bath.

Emma hesitantly peers into the crib at this tiny new Sim ...

But as soon as she picks Malina up and holds her close, Emma's amazed at how sweet and soft she is in her arms.

"Oh my goodness aren't you just the sweetest little nooboo!"

Right then and there, Emma knows she wants to be the best Mom she can be for her own little one when he or she comes along. Her determination to make her own marriage work is renewed. She and Simon may have issues, but thankfully nothing as terrible as the Parrott's problems!

She makes a quick silent wish to the Watcher ...

"Please give me the patience to be a great Mama. Oh, and please don't let my husband find the credit card bills yet!"

Finally Jazlyn is done getting ready. Emma tells her she looks very pretty (privately she's not so sure designer french fashion works for Jazlyn) ...

"You look pretty as a flower, don't you feel a little better now?"

 But no, Jazlyn does not feel better. Emma's going to have to pull out all the stops on this social job!

She gets Jazlyn to talk about the baby, to help her feel some happiness about the birth. She remarks about what a sweet baby Malina seems to be and how lucky Jazlyn is to have a beautiful daughter. She asks Jazlyn where she chose the name Malina from, because its so pretty.

"Malina is a Hawaiian name meaning 'peace' or 'calm' ...  I, guess I could use some of that right now ..."

Emma definitely agrees! She decides to go book a spa and salon treatment package for Jazlyn in the next day or so.

Jazlyn thanks Emma again for being such a great friend to her and tells her how she's really helped her feel braver about what she has to do.

"I don't know what I'd have done without you here Emma, I was starting to lose it and not even get out of bed!"

True to her word, Jazlyn takes the first opportunity she gets to confront Kanoa after he finally comes sauntering in after being 'out on business' for two days!

At first Kanoa tries to act as if he's genuinely ashamed of being gone ...

"You don't even think its slightly inappropriate to be gone for days after the birth of your child??"

But then Jazlyn goes straight to the attack and tells Kanoa she knows all about his love affairs ...

"What??! ... Cheating on you?!?!"

"Don't even try to play innocent, you're a lying cheating sim!"

Kanoa demands to know what proof she has of these accusations!!

"You think I don't know all about your fake computer Waffle Account?!

Kanoa's suddenly silent and open mouthed as the full impact of his hidden secrets are realized.

Jazlyn goes in for the final blow ...

"You're a lying WAFFLE and I want you OUT of this house immediately!!"

 Kanoa is NOT amused.

"Wait .... wait ... did you just call me a ... Waffle?!?!"

Why yes, yes she did Kanoa. You're done for dude.

"Waffle Waffle Waffle!!!" (And the dreaded double red minus!)

Kanoa stands there silently for a minute, then shrugs flippantly and pulls out his cell phone to call a cab. He claims he'll go stay with his brother Kale, but I think we can reasonably guess he's lying there too!

(Especially since Kale and Kanoa are already bitter enemies)

(Kanoa, you better get that cab called quick dude, she's thinking about daggers again ...)

Of all the things Kanoa should be doing as his home-life starts to crumble in front of him, he decides to go say farewell to his stupid mean parrot instead of, you know, his new baby, or his older son. 

"My old buddy, remember there's always more finely feathered ladybirds out there!!"

And so Kanoa Parrot packs a bag and heads out the door to the waiting cab without so much as a backwards glance to his house or his entire family. Jazlyn stands at the door sadly holding the baby he never even bothered to meet.

Good riddance to you both! 

Read on to Ch. 1.8 - "Ch-ch-ch-ch-Changes" HERE!


A chapter entirely without any Simon at all!

I felt that the Parrotts deserved their very own soap opera chapter since their break up was so epic and Kanoa has such a horrible womanizer reputation now haha!

I hope you enjoyed the funnies. I promise to get back to the cute family-in-the-making next chapter!


  1. I don't HATE Simon. : P I just want to whack him on the head until it manages to knock some sense into him.

    But yeah, Emma should be happy her husband is nothing like Kanoa.

    1. I agree, Simon needs a whack with a newspaper (like you can do to werewolves haha)!

      Kanoa was pre-set up for womanizing before the game even started, I had no idea! There's so many great soap opera opportunities with that, in a small town. Especially considering there's more than one, and the other women don't even know about each other. I checked his relationship panel haha. Maybe some of their drama will take minor roles later on, but for now I wanted the Parrotts to have one bit of spotlight before my next generation is born!

  2. The waffle-swearing is my favorite. XD Such potty mouths.

    1. Haha thanks Alona. When I was taking screenshots, I was like - "why are you yelling at him about waffles?!" ... sometimes the chat and thought bubbles are perfectly fitting and then other times it makes no sense, so you just gotta roll with it. I decided waffles must have some double-meaning in simlish!

      Glad you liked the humor. I loved Kanoa's facial expression after she called him a waffle. :P

  3. OMG, I will never think of waffles the same way again. xD

    1. Yeah, what on sim-earth does a waffle have to do with a cheating man that's so terrible. It must be really bad! :P

  4. Are you sure Emma's prayer to the Watcher wasn't more like 'Please don't kill me off or take my baby from me and ship me off somewhere'?

    When I played in AP, before I started I did a lot of face work on the premades, and Jazlyn's perma-frown got fixed. I mean, it was funny because her life sucks, but I was not letting her breed that thing all over town. And good thing too because after she booted Kanoa she married that Hobble guy and immediately started pumping out Hobble-Parrotts left and right.
    Anyway, I really loved this chapter, the waffle scene was just brilliant.

    1. I know, I know! If she only knew ... poor lil' thing. I don't have the heart to do anything cruel to her so the story will go another direction that will hopefully work out ok for Emma. =)

      And yes, I think with the spa/salon appointment Emma's making for Jazlyn, there's going to need to be some really creative makeup or slight botoxing of the corners of her mouth *wink wink* hehe.

  5. I like Kanoa, he gives the gossips of a small town something to gossip about! I've always loved his shirt too. lol

    Fun chapter! Soap Operas are a lot of fun to write!

    1. Yes, I love the sim-drama that's funny at the same time. I have such a hard time taking them seriously so I would really suck at a serious drama... I will probably put some in eventually when the story presents itself that way, but for the most part my legacy will most likely remain light hearted even when there's drama. :)